JULY 18, 2026 – NOT BITTER

READ: Eph. 5:22–33

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. – Col. 3:18,19

In our time even Christians find it difficult to say that the wife in marriage ought to be subject to her husband. It is then argued that this applied only to the time in which the Bible originated, shortly after Christ’s ascension. The inequality between the sexes, it is said, was a consequence of the curse brought by the fall into sin: “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you” (Gen. 3:16).

With Christ’s sacrifice, however, we now live in a time in which this curse has been removed and we live by grace. That, it is argued, ought also to have its effect in the relationship between husband and wife. Equality should now prevail. That this is not yet visible in the apostolic letters would then be due to adaptation to the culture of that time. Meanwhile, we have progressed, and now equality should have its place, just as in the world.

Thus far the reasoning of those who no longer wish to acknowledge any distinction between man and woman. It is indeed easier in this way to live as a Christian in this world—but do we thereby do justice to the Lord God as Creator and to Jesus Christ as our Head?

Has not the Lord God created man differently from woman, with different tasks and different positions? In 1 Cor. 11 Paul discusses this extensively in connection with worship, calling himself a follower of Christ. He states: “For a man indeed ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man.” Behind this lies no social theory, nor a curse: “For man is not from woman, but woman from man.”

In Eph. 5:22–33 Paul compares the loving relationship of the Lord Jesus as Head with His church to that of the husband as head of his wife. This headship is not oppression or venting frustration, but loving leadership (cf. Col. 3:19; Eph. 5:25–29,33). In the Lord there is not sameness, but equal worth (Gal. 3:28).

Do you see the difference between “equal” and “equally worthy”?
Singing: Ps. 85:3,4